Sunday, January 27, 2013

Adell Fink 1938-2013

My mother-in-law Adell Fink passed away this morning at 75 from complications of Alzheimer's Disease.

Her life over the past 3 years, and especially over the past 6 months, has been less than happy as she slowly lost her ability to enjoy the things she used to love. She was feisty and independent and sometimes a little crazy. She was difficult at times and incredibly generous at others. She tried hard, but undiagnosed mental illness made life difficult for her at times.

Today I remember her for taking me to the Bullocks Wilshire tearoom for lunch when I was in my early 20's before I married her son. She and her daughter didn't always get along easily, and she wanted a daughter to hang out with, I think. She and I had our ups and downs too, but as her dementia progressed, I only felt caring and love toward her and that she was like a child who needed help and understanding, and any difficulties that had come before disappeared. Scott and I tried to do right by her to the best of our abilities, though she was not always cooperative. I learned a lot about patience and understanding.

She loved shopping, Louis Vuitton handbags, travel, Jeopardy!, movies, art, theater and opera, her grandchildren, the color red. She was a member of Sisterhood at her temple and very involved in many temple activities. She loved makeup, too, and one of my daughters has inherited this trait!

She cooked huge holiday meals at Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, and Passover, making huge pots of chicken soup with matzo balls and her famous brisket. She was said to make the best chopped liver around, but I never tasted it since I don't like liver.

We have been mourning her for so long, watching her gradual deterioration. I hope she is with her mom, Betty, and her dog, also Betty, and has found a peaceful place to rest after her long journey through her turbulent life.

Rest in peace, Adell.

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